Heather
Why is it that so many office sayings seem to resolve around sports, like

"He dropped the ball"
"Let's get the ball rolling"
"He really struck out"
"Let's take one for the team"
"Let's touch base"

I think it's another way for men to dominate at work by having all these "sports" slang sayings. Regardless these saying annoy the crap out of me.

Here are some other slange terms- some of these I have never heard
404 - Someone who is clueless. From the Web error message, “404 Not Found,” which means the document requested couldn’t be located. “Don’t bother asking John. He’s 404.”

Adminisphere - The rarified organizational layers above the rank and file that makes decisions that are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant.

Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. “I dunno, ask Rick. He’s our alpha geek.”

Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.

Betamaxed - When a technology is overtaken in the market by inferior but better marketed competition as in “Microsoft betamaxed Apple right out of the market”

Blamestorming - A group discussion of why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.

Bookmark - To take note of a person for future reference. “After seeing his cool demo at Siggraph, I bookmarked him.”

Brain Fart - A byproduct of a bloated mind producing information effortlessly; a burst of useful information. “I know you’re busy on the Microsoft story, but can you give us a brain fart on the Mitnik bust?” Variation of old hacker slang that had more negative connotations.

CGI Joe - A hard-core CGI script programmer with all the social skills and charisma of a plastic action figure.

Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the top brass with clean hands.

Chip Jewelry - Old computers destined to be scrapped or turned into decoration. “I paid three grand for that Mac and now it’s nothing but chip jewelry.”
Chips and Salsa - Chips = hardware, salsa = software. “First we gotta figure out if the problem’s in your chips or your salsa.”

CLM (Career Limiting Move)- Used by microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. “Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.”

Cobweb - A WWW site that never changes.

Crapplet - A badly written or profoundly useless Java applet. “I just wasted 30 minutes downloading that crapplet!”

Cube Farm - An office filled with cubicles.

Dead Tree Edition - The paper version of a publication available in both paper and electronic forms.

Dilberted - To be exploited and oppressed by your boss, as is Dilbert, the comic strip character. “Damn, I’ve been dilberted again! The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week.”
Dorito Syndrome - The feeling of emptiness and dissatisfaction triggered by addictive substances that lack nutritional content. “I just spent six hours surfing the Web, and now I’ve got a bad case of Dorito Syndrome.”

Egosurfing - Scanning the Net, databases, etc., for one’s own name.

Elvis Year - The peak year of popularity as in “1993 was Barney the dinosaur’s Elvis year”
Flight Risk - Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave a company or department soon.

Generica - Fast food joints, strip malls, sub-divisions as in “we were so lost in generica that I couldn’t remember what city it was”.

Glazing - Corporate-speak for sleeping with your eyes open; a popular pastime at conferences and early-morning meetings. “Didn’t he notice that by the second session half the room was glazing?”

GOOD job - A “Get-Out-Of-Debt” job. A well-paying job people take in order to pay off their debts, one that they will quit as soon as they are solvent again.

Gray Matter - Older, experienced business people hired by young entrepreneurial firms trying to appear more professional and established.

Graybar Land - The place you go while you’re staring at a computer that’s processing something very slowly (while you watch the gray bar creep across the screen). “That CAD rendering put me in graybar land for like an hour.”

High Dome - Egghead, scientist, PhD

Idea Hamsters - People whose idea generators are always running.

Irritainment - Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying, but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example.

Link Rot - The process by which web page’s links become obsolete as the sites they’re connected to change or die.

Mouse Potato - The online generation’s answer to the couch potato.

Ohnosecond - That minuscule fraction of time during which you realize you’ve just made a terrible error.

Open-Collar Workers - People who work at home or telecommute.

Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

Plug-and-Play - A new hire who doesn’t require training. “That new guy is totally plug-and-play.”

Prairie Dogging - When something loud happens in a cube farm, causing heads to pop up over the walls trying to see what’s going on.

Salmon Day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed in the end. “God, today was a total salmon day!”

Seagull Manager - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps over everything and then leaves.

SITCOMs - What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. “Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage”

Starter Marriage - A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce with no kids, no property and no regrets.

Stress Puppy - A person who thrives on being stressed-out and whiny.

Swiped Out - An ATM or credit card that has been used so much its magnetic strip is worn away.

Treeware - Hacker slang for documentation or other printed material.

Umfriend - One with whom one has a sexual relationship; as in, “this is Dale, my…um…friend.”

Under Mouse Arrest - Getting busted for violating an online service’s rule of conduct. “Sorry I couldn’t get back to you. AOL put me under mouse arrest.”

Uninstalled - Euphemism for being fired. Also: decruitment.

WOOFYS - Well Off Older Folks.

Xerox Subsidy - Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one’s workplace.

Yuppie Food Coupons - Twenty dollar bills from an ATM.
Heather
I found the coolest site where you can make your own wedding website for free- it's called Wedding Wire. They have all these nice templates to dress up your page and you can add multiple pages, cool gadgets and tons of photos. I just spent the last three hours on this site. Oh, not I am becoming addicted to the internet.
Heather
I ate a twinkie from the vending machine yesterday- very bad I know. The twinkie had kind of a lemony taste to it which I found unusual, so I decided to look up a little more information about this little snack. Apparently there is a consensus out there that twinkies have an indefinite shelf life. I did a little research and found that this is a myth. Here are some other fun filled twinkie facts (yes that is a pun)

Twinkies were invented in 1930
The original cream filling was banana
They have a shelf life of about 25 days
Hostess has never said how they are made- (Are they baked)
Twinkies mascot is named "Twinkie the kid" he wears a cowboy hat and scarf

You may have seen in my earlier post a photo of a twinkie wedding cake. Well I guess they are quite popular, here are some fancier twinkie cakes below. I think I may forget the traditional wedding cake and go with a twinkie cake.




Heather
Life-

It's supposed to rain for the next 5 days.

I am starving on this diet

One of my bridesmaids has not responded to me at all about the dress I picked. Is she pissed?

My toe is killing me. (I cracked my toes too much and now it hurts to walk)

Work-

Our wages are still frozen

Reviews are coming up

No half day Fridays this summer

I am venting I know it could be worse....
Labels: , 1 comments | edit post
Heather
I love to read, I really do but I only usually read one type of genre- mystery/thriller. Now a lot of these mystery/thrillers are also "romantic suspense". To give you an idea of what types of books I mean- read anything by Lisa Jackson or Beverly Barton.

The thing that pisses me off about romantic suspense is that the relationship between the heroine of the book and male character who is usually A. detective, B. old friend of the family, C. the bad boy of the town, is just so fake. Here is how it usually plays out

1. Female is being stalked, tormented etc...
2. Enter male to aid female
3. He is there to help female but she doesn't want it usually because
A. She has been hurt in the past
B. She's uber independent and who needs men?
C. She is emotionally damaged
4. Female is rude and bitchy to male and vice versa. However they are secretly attracted to one another
5. Female gets scared because of #1 and she gradually lets male in.
6. They get closer and have mind blowing sex- so mind blowing that the world could explode and they wouldn't know it.
7. They regret it and go back to being bitchy with each other
8. Female is usually kidnapped by bad man who is stalking her
9. Male saves the day
10. Female and male decide to get married or else the female is already pregnant from their one night of passion

Yes folks, that is usually how it all plays out, some things are changed but the male/female relationship is always the same. Event though I know this and it drives me nuts I continue to buy these books. If there is one thing I hate it is predictable fiction.
Heather
Ok so today is the start of the diet. So far this is what I've had

Breakfast- snuck a biscuit- very bad but they were left over from strawberry shortcake last night. Western omelet, they are delicious and only 150 cal. 2 cups of coffee

Morning Snack- Banana

Lunch- eating now, Medifast broc soup, Medifast garden veg crackers, 1 cheese stick, 1 light yogurt and diet coke

Afternoon snack will probably be- 1 apricot and either a shake or bar

The broccoli soup is a bit bland, last night I had a beef vegetable and that was bland too.

Last night I brought the doggie for a walk. I don't like bringing him out by my house because the street is too busy and sometime other large dogs are unleashed. So I decided to bring him to this large cemetery by the house I grew up in. When I was younger I used to roller blade in there. It's huge and there are usually not many other cars or people there.

Well last night there must have been 5 other people walking dogs, apparently it is a hot spot. I saw a teenage girl with an adorable pom, Teddy (my doggie) liked him too. Thank god he didn't try to hump him, he does that sometimes. So the walk was good, I will try going back there another day.
Heather

Brad Pitt movies are not always good, in fact they can be downright cheesy. I turned on the tv tonight and found a little gem he was in back in the day. Oh my god, horrible 80s horrow movie. Don't get me wrong I liked campy horror but this was bad. I guess at least he good to look at in it- but the acting- horrible.
Here is the synopsis from Wikipedia The plot revolves around the return of Brian Woods (Leitch), a "problem teen," to his high school. He has just been released from a mental hospital; he was committed after the suspicious death of his father, who crashed and died while driving a car with cut brakes. He falls in love with classmate Paula Carson (Jill Schoelen), but the local basketball star Dwight Ingalls (Brad Pitt) is already Paula's boyfriend. Meanwhile, the lecherous school principal also seeks unfortunate Paula's affections. Then horrible murders start happening, with no one certain of the identity of the culprit. The main suspects are Dwight, whose control of his anger has never been perfect, the mysterious Woods, who may not have been fully cured at the sanitarium, and the disgusting principal, who seems to stop at nothing in his attempts to bed Paula.
Heather
I found this story on yahoo "Odd news" and just had to share it....


BERLIN (Reuters) – A fox has been unmasked as the mystery thief of more than 100 shoes in the small western German town of Foehren, authorities said Friday.
A forest worker stumbled upon shoes strewn near the fox's den and found a trove of footwear down the hole which had recently been stolen overnight from outside locals' front doors.
"There was everything from ladies' shoes to trainers," said a local police spokesman. "We've found between 110 and 120 so far. It seems a vixen stole them for her cubs to play with."
Although many were missing laces, the shoes were in good condition and their owners were delighted to reclaim them, he said, adding that no reprisals were planned against the culprit.
(Reporting by Dave Graham; editing by Philippa Fletcher)
Heather
I once read a book called "The Store" by Bentley Little. It's about this huge store that has every item you can imagine and the store that takes over a town and closes all the mom and pop stores. The store tries to convert the town to shop there by catering to each individuals dark desires and vices. The book is really interesting and you can tell the author is definitely basing the store on Walmart.

I heard the other day that 15% of all retail sales are from Walmart. That is just amazing, it really is taking over the world. In fact, every time I go in there I spend at least $50 and I know the reason why. Everything is so cheap so you think oh I will get this and that and maybe this too, before you know it you've bought a bunch of junk you don't even need, just because of the good price.
Heather
I am on the "Next Day" diet, have you heard of it? It's great because it always starts the next day. Seriously I plan to start tomorrow- for real. I say this as I finish leftover Chinese food.

For this new diet I invested in Medifast meal replacements. You can buy shakes, puddings, soups, bars and crackers. The goal is to eat about 6 times a day, but you're only eating about 100-150 calories each time you eat. Hopefully this will help me shed a few pounds. I don't know when it got so hard to lose weight.
Heather
Folks, since I'm getting married I think it's time I choose an appropriate wedding theme....Here
are a few I am considering...


The goth look


Ayyyy... you landlubber




Ghetto sytle




Camoflauge is not just for the army




Ah yes, twinkies and beer, a red neck wedding would be great.


Heather






If you know me you know I love my dog, he's my baby. Well for others like me or anyone with some extra cash- why not just spoil the pooch like crazy. Yes, folks you can now buy a doggy mansion for $10,000- so forget about that vacation you were saving for and buy the dog a house instead.
Check out the site for yourself-